WIERDIEST SPAM I have ever recieved! - Vintage Mustang Forums

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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 12:39 PM Thread Starter
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Grin WIERDIEST SPAM I have ever recieved!

I've received SPAM for years now and mostly it's the usual "I need help getting Millions of dollars out of my country", but this one I got today takes the cake! It's just plain nuts! I do however have to award points for creativity.

I have deleted all links to protect the innocent:

JP.MONFORT’s Report to The Moon

GLOBAL PRESS RELEASE 20-February-2015 | The Office of JP.Monfort
LINK DELTED


Following your specific instructions as pre-recorded in my consciousness in 2210 prior to time-travelling to present time on Earth and as part of my mission to take Humanity following the shortest time path possible to the World of Decemland, I am filing this Second Report to The Moon on February 20 2015.

Over the past two months some of the World’s most extraordinary women and men have spoken through me to a global audience of 5 and a half million Experts in every corner of Planet Earth. From Albert Einstein to Charles Chaplin, from Marie Curie to Charles Dickens, these extraordinary women and men speak to Humanity from The Moonfort inside the Moon’s core. They are teaching us the lessons of history so that we as a Human family choose to start the most exciting journey towards Decemland, the Land of Ten Percent.

Following your specific instructions I have begun to identify Presidential Candidates in some of the World’s neediest countries. I will support these fine candidates in their attempt to reach power. I will teach them to love their fellow citizens and work in their sole interest. We will take over as many nation-states as possible and embrace new fraternal and universal principles of Love and Dream. The Expert Dreamers who will inhabit Decemland on Malagasy (Madagascar) soil will support our Presidential Candidates joining The The United States Strategic Team.

I miss the World of Decemland in 2210. I am experimenting severe difficulties adapting to present time Earth. Humans are extremely greedy and fearful, they are very suspicious of anyone who approaches them in an altruistic manner. Humans have been trained to love themselves instead of to love one another. Differences remain. Global media conglomerates portray a very distorted interpretation of reality and bias individual perceptions. Short-term dynamics drives profits and attitudes. Beauty, power and money are the most valuable and demanded assets. Inequality perpetuates. In a World of plenty billions remain extremely poor.

On December 23 2014 I eye-witnessed the take off of a rocket towards the Moon. I am not sure if this rocket landed other time-travellers on Earth’s surface or picked them up. Please clarify through the standard protocol and broadcasting channel. I need more inspiration, deploy it at sea level in Full Moon from The Moonfort, I shall be ready to absorb it as previously executed. Over and out.

You are receiving this communication because you have been identified as an Expert in you area of activity. Your next step if you wish to join The The United States Strategic Team is to send your one-paragraph biography to LINK DELETED. 3,505 Expert Dreamers from 197 countries and territories have already joined the best team designed to serve the long-term public interest of All Americans. For more information please call Nominated Coordinator Prof Wendelin Hume at +1 701 7774001.

--
JPMONFORT
Find out more about The The United States Strategic Team at LINK DELETED
The Office of JP.Monfort | Decemland Suite at The Carlton Hotel
Rue Pierre Stibbe Anosy, Antananarivo 101 (Madagascar) Tel +261 20 22 260 60

At a press conference around that time, Truman was asked what the United States would get for its aid to Europe. We are not doing this for credit, Truman told the members of the National Conference of Editorial Writers. We are doing it because it is right and it's necessary.
--- Greg Behrman, The Most Noble Adventure






This message and any attachment are confidential and may be privileged or otherwise protected from disclosure. If you are not the intended recipient, please delete this message and any attachment from your system. If you are not the intended recipient you must not copy this message or attachment or disclose the contents to any other person. The intended recipient should be a dreamer who loves and a lover who dreams. If you do not still dream and love, you are encouraged to begin dreaming and loving at your earliest convenience.You are receiving this communication because you have been identified as an Expert in your country. If you no longer wish to receive communications from this Office, please send an empty email with the email address you wish to remove in the subject field to remove.unitedstates (at) monfortcloa (dot) info


1968 Coupe - Original Sprint B, J-Code Car

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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 01:23 PM
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How many mustangs can you fit in a moon fort? Probably only about 10% I presume.
LOL.

Joe in Detroit
1969 Mustang Sports Roof (SAG = Sports Appearance Group) 1 of only 5,729
1966 Ranchero Custom 1 of only 11,000 made. (For Sale)
2014 Mustang V6 premium pony package
1969 Mustang Grande (sold)

Personal Quote from 5-1-15. ''DRIVE IT LIKE YOU HAVE TO POOP!"

"It was a beautiful day, the sun beat down
I had the radio on, I was drivin'
Trees flew by, me and Del were singin' little Runaway
I was flyin'"
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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 01:52 PM
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Alrighty then......

So quik, what exactly is your "area of expertise?"

As the drill sergeant said, "I taught you everything you know. I didn't teach you everything I know."

"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."
- Douglas Adams
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 02:55 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GT289 View Post
Alrighty then......

So quik, what exactly is your "area of expertise?"
I'll have to email JP and ask, cause I'm still trying to figure it out!


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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 06:03 PM
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Wow! And I thought Malagasy was destroyed in 2143, during the war. I guess the history book was wrong.

Spliffy
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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 06:09 PM
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Wow..... sad thing is, is that I've know people who might send an email like that...


66 A code coupe project.... ugly purple (hey, unless you're into Vikings pride all over you car)
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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 06:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Mr Squirrel View Post
Wow..... sad thing is, is that I've know people who might send an email like that...
Okay, so I sent out a few creative emails. I don't appreciate the "loco" smiley...

John

Do NOT send me a private message, email me directly:delstv@aol.com
http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/v...mustangftp.jpg
now sandblasted and DP40'd since this pic was taken.
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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 07:35 PM
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Okay, so I sent out a few creative emails. I don't appreciate the "loco" smiley...

John
So are you a relative on my mother's or father's side?


66 A code coupe project.... ugly purple (hey, unless you're into Vikings pride all over you car)
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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 03:38 PM
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So are you a relative on my mother's or father's side?
I'm not saying, but we did chat at a family wedding...



John

Do NOT send me a private message, email me directly:delstv@aol.com
http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/v...mustangftp.jpg
now sandblasted and DP40'd since this pic was taken.
http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/v...ngdriveway.jpg
a two legged hole shot, even with a munged up carb and snow tires...
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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 03:48 PM
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Apparently, this fella hasn't watched back to the future. If I've learned anything, it's that you can't screw with present time to make the future better. You'll end up with a Biff Tower of problems. He's only risking destroying his beloved Decemeland. Also, if I could go back in time I would have to tap Marilyn and not just talk to smart people... just sayin...

2011 Mustang 3.7L Premium Pony Package
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post #11 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 04:15 PM
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Also, if I could go back in time I would have to tap Marilyn .
I think you'd be standing in quite a line..

If you do get a working time machine, go back and tell Ford to galvanize the Mustang's frame rails, floors and cowl.

Thanks.

John

Do NOT send me a private message, email me directly:delstv@aol.com
http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/v...mustangftp.jpg
now sandblasted and DP40'd since this pic was taken.
http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/v...ngdriveway.jpg
a two legged hole shot, even with a munged up carb and snow tires...
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post #12 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 04:26 PM
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I thought all rocket flights to the moon were canceled due to the measles outbreak at Disneyland? I guess not.

Tom

I'm not a complete idiot, pieces are missing.
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post #13 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 04:37 PM
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I think you'd be standing in quite a line..

If you do get a working time machine, go back and tell Ford to galvanize the Mustang's frame rails, floors and cowl.

Thanks.

John
Not if I don't share my time traveling technology!

I'll also warn them that 50 years later people are still worried about fuel tank explosions! I'll also let them know that at the time they'll have very good sales success, but the Mustang II will tank with collectors!

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post #14 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 04:44 PM
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Weird? Ok, you haven't taken a phone call from a dead guy.
That's weird.

Phone rings- "hello"
Caller- "I'm looking for Leon" (really static filled call)
"He's not home, may I take a message?"
Caller- "This is Bill Hudson, just have Leon call when he gets home"

Leon gets home and is told of the phone call and says that's
interesting because Bill Hudson has been dead a couple of years......

As the drill sergeant said, "I taught you everything you know. I didn't teach you everything I know."

"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."
- Douglas Adams
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post #15 of 18 (permalink) Old 03-10-2015, 08:04 PM
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I think Decemland is between Novemland, and Januland. I thing you have to go through Novemland to get to Decemland. If you go to far you will totally pass through Decemland. If your not care full you could get in Januland and before you know it you are in Februland and we all know what S@#! Hole Fubruland is. This only happens about 10 % of the time though.

Joe in Detroit
1969 Mustang Sports Roof (SAG = Sports Appearance Group) 1 of only 5,729
1966 Ranchero Custom 1 of only 11,000 made. (For Sale)
2014 Mustang V6 premium pony package
1969 Mustang Grande (sold)

Personal Quote from 5-1-15. ''DRIVE IT LIKE YOU HAVE TO POOP!"

"It was a beautiful day, the sun beat down
I had the radio on, I was drivin'
Trees flew by, me and Del were singin' little Runaway
I was flyin'"
Tom Petty, Runnin Down A Dream.
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